18 December, 2012

When the Pigeons Come Home


Earlier, this week I had what most people would call a “glimpse of the divine.” I hesitate writing about this solely on the basis that I could never do justice with my description. I pretty much figure I can do the exact things I did that day and will not be able to produce the same results, based on non-clinging to good or bad. It occurred after a workout, and then a short meditation in the open park at dusk. And in meditation I heard footsteps that turned out to be a komodo dragon walking by my stone seat and up a coconut tree. Yes, I peeked and smiled at him. The awareness of “this state” continued even while on public transportation at rush hour, which kind of tickled me. I felt as if people could see through me on the underground. It was lovely to be divorced from the body-mind connection, and the free floating freedom from the conditioned mind that throws us into where are we going, doing next, worries or even body pain. I have had it happen as long(about 1 hour), back in 2000 when blessed by a monk in a Khmer temple on the Thai/Cambodian border that instigated my whole path in meditation and Buddhism. Speech is the easiest thing to quickly break this welcome change in awareness. The minute I arrived home to describe to my partner it just gradually fell away. It was strange that it was not an abrupt ending and signalled to me that this indescribable, and is best explained by relaxing all ideas of self to others in their presence.

5 comments:

spldbch said...

I imagine it's difficult not to want to "cling" to such a tranquil state of being. On the other hand, clinging to it is probably the quickest way to destroy it.

Was Once said...

I have encountered this with my first Vipassana, a state of dissolution called bhanga that I observed arising and passing, along with body pain, and thoughts. Everything is impermanent, good or bad and this was a good lesson, when I named it and enjoyed it, it slipped away. Luckily I had teachings about this along the way. So, gradually with this experiential method one's body-mind will incorporate this into daily life. It for most is not a one time deal, many years of conditioning is hard to break. It is kind of jarring to know that this happiness we have trained to seek since birth is an unstable state, the carrot appears and disappears in front of the donkey.
A more detailed description is here:
http://archive.thebuddhadharma.com/issues/2003/spring/goenka_pure_attention.html

Shirley Fornaseri said...
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Jeanne Desy said...

I profoundly experienced a Komodo dragon lizard at the zoo. Its primitive energy. Some years later I experienced the same energy with an elderly Amish man who was running a little store. You could call it gravity, as in graveness. It reminded me of stone, the way stones feel.... As a bipolar,I'm another damaged brain here, of course, theoretically, and I often experience people's energy. Have sometimes wished I lived in a primitive culture where I would be recognized as a shaman....I hope you had a fine retreat.

Was Once said...

Jeanne,
The 10-day was amazingly hard but so much breakthroughs upon coming home. And I actually inspired monks, and lay taking the same 10-day course being in front of them. They said when they peaked I never moved!

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