I whooped a two week down cycle that is natural effect of human existence, and came back to some kind of normal, which I managed to do by doing kind things for others and taking 5-HTP. After my first good day, I had a dream that night that I am kind of like a candy apple, a hard outside protecting a soft and perishable inside. That actually came in the dream along with experiences labeling the fact that my near death was really a “death.” I was brought back to life from my hospital nightmare not like in regular human body, but with the sole purpose of making merit and helping others. In the dream I would visit those that can see me, and others I would be right beside them and they no idea I was there. It may seem like a weird calling dream, and it may have been triggered with the letter to Carlos, or a Thai friend who upon helping him figure out Paypal, and sent money so he could pay his first Ebay bill, said, “you are such a good friend.” I did express to him how much I appreciated him showing me temples and places when my partner was busy with school, so I felt I could spend a couple hours figuring out his problem. It is so important to honor people who honor you, and it came across in my dream. Perhaps, I had not done enough of that before my “death.”
So, for the ones who do see me, in the context of my dream, I am there to help them. They are not fooled because they act upon seeing a good heart, or maybe it is just a repaired one.