When I feel like the next thing that I do or get done, that I will be happier upon finishing… I am reminded that I am not being present. We all often think to the future even when it is only 5 minutes down the road of life or to the past when can recall pleasant things or past traumas that we feel great being away from. When I find myself thinking towards a better bite or better mental image I tell myself I am mind casting.
Lately, I have been gathering my old photos and negatives and sending them back to the people I shot. One old friend had tears in his eyes when I gave them back to him...it touched him so. Of course it bring up some old nostalgia about those that were friends, while at the same time bringing ideas of my future once my partner finishes his masters. All of this happens in the mind, the past being gone and the future was never here. This mental conjuring that I do signal some discomfort that I am presently feeling. It more often that not means I should sit down and meditate. This would put me back into my body faster and allow time to explore all what I am feeling internally.
I have enjoyed a friend visiting, a fellow seeker who brings my path directly to me. We talk a lot, and meditate together when we can. He also exposes me to his ideas spurring me to think about pure awareness, alone, separate from any path. This pure awareness is not something that comes out of books, but deeper meditation and conscious mindfulness while awake as to the real wisdom that lies within. I am really trying to be mindful of everything I do, maybe not at every minute like my friend who has given up most everything he had but a backpack. But everyone’s path is different, and the circumstances that bring us to the desire for wisdom and seeing life as it truly is…is absent of mind casting.