A Healthy Set of Questions

Today, a man at the gym unloaded on me, starting first at what he thought I had. He was wrong, guessing heart attack, but I have spoken to him a few times and it must have never sunk in. His guess was based on his own fears of causing a heart attack to himself, worrying about various things. He knows I meditate, but he is not anywhere close to wanting to change the way he has been doing things. I tried to ease his mind, to learning to just stop all thoughts 2-5 seconds as Bentinho Massaro suggests...again and again. I said just rest in your body when you know you are living in your head. Being an ear, was therapeutic to me to just relax and show someone else I care. His problems are what most of us encounter in life, doubt. Yet, he is far better position financially than myself, enabling me to relax my own fears in the process.

Act of Kindness Hazard

Yesterday, driving home from the Nun’s Vihara where we had a supporter’s meeting, I saw a novice monk waiting for the bus, and stopped my car and asked him if he would like a ride. It is right outside the temple along the park. He hesitated because he could not read my intention, so I immediately thought this is wrong, and thought about just leaving, but did not want to be rude and just turn on my heels. I was going along the same route on the way to another sit. When convinced I was O.K., the Thai monk got in and asked me to drive him to Golden Gate…not thinking it was the bridge…I drove him into the park, but he made it known that he was talking about the bridge. In further discussion, I got the sense that he is not a monk as a way to access wisdom, but more along the line that it was a free ticket. His speech and manner were questionable which tipped me off. I took him to the bridge, and had to leave fast to get across town in time for my sit. He wanted my cell number, which I reluctantly gave him, and then he asked me to drive him to San Jose today. It was asked in a very forward manner, so I was a bit bothered, because he obviously doesn’t know the time and cost. I did not give him a firm answer. I went to my sit and with the phone off, I got a text saying thank you and I hope you enjoy your meditation. But again, I thought this was a set-up. I was eating a late dinner having missed my lunch, and again got another text. The monk wanted to go in the morning. Arrgh! So, I texted him back that I will offer a drive to CalTrain and pay a one-way ticket for you instead. He finally said fine, and the whole time I was cursing myself when I felt it was out of line, based on my intuition. I thought about texting a lie that I could not make it, or calling him on his behavior, but did not. I thought I would use it for my practice of patience. This morning, just when I was going to leave to pick him up to go to the train, he texted me to say, “I won’t be going”. Now, I know the reputation of the head monk of the temple he was staying at and perhaps this may have come up with the two of them over breakfast. Or maybe the monk reviewed his reason for wanting to go to San Jose, or even the overstepping of my kindness, but regardless things happened to work out …as soon as I relaxed.

This Moment

What if this moment is all we have. How many thoughts go through your head, while at the time you are reading this? I am writing this, while recalling the time that is depicted in a photo of my family on my dresser, taken when I was probably 13. Where in the exact spot a day later, I met a man who was bicycling around the world. He spun tales of this to me back then, amazing my little head. My moments with him, traveled with his tales. That moment with him is way gone... never to be repeated, a well as my father in the day before photo. Everything seems to be written in stone at any given time, but in actuality is more like the wisps of clouds shown in the photo. So, if this moment someone shows kindness or laughter with you, pay attention and don't miss it. You will end up savoring it... at another time, sprinkled with your many thoughts.

I am currently, enjoying several happy moments I had today and not bothered with those other moments that could really seem so serious and almost melancholy. It is a choice we have to bring feelings into relived moments.

Waiting on Transportation

We often think that if we just figure out where to go and when ...we will reach a place where we can find happiness. Meanwhile, we may even be sitting quietly and enjoying a cup of tea, forgetting how perfect this moment can be, right now. We don't realize we can postpone happiness until it's too late.

I looked at all the serious faces this morning in a relaxing yoga class. Why so serious? To get it done and then be happy. What happens if you can't do it?

On Truth and Advertising

Once upon a time I used to work on Saturn car account from its introduction. They were supposed to be a "different kind of car company," yet still had the heavy hand of GM all over it. I knew and most all of the team knew that these cars were not revolutionary or even that unique. One small example, I picked my choice of paint colors at the beginning and two of the colors I picked did not get used until the line was close to the end, nearly 20 years later. I worked on selling something I had no faith in, unlike meditation and truth which is my life now. But it did teach me about false speech.

Dhamma Service

The birds were singing, the sun was shining for my service on a short course at Vipassana. “You got lucky,” I heard from the guy who turned it over to me when he sat out this course. We had a team that consisted of three people who had just served recently and 4 had an idea of what was involved. One man had served 15 courses and was nearly blind from Retinitis pigmentosa but still was able to clean the heavy pots, knowing it from before his vision got worse. He was just one of a source of inspiration for the wisdom of dhamma to enable one to be happy even under difficult circumstances. I led him back and forth form the hall, sometimes letting him use my shape to follow. When it was too dark, letting him place a hand on my shoulder. We had a wide range of people and everyone clicked in to fill in places to get things done fast. It was exciting and fun to watch a wide range of people unknown to each other, help one another all without any problems. It was also noticeable to watch no one was ‘fake nice’ while at the same time biting his or her tongue. We had enough time to get to know each other over food breaks, and spend time to compare dhamma stories. It all got done, and towards the end even faster than we imagined. Then when the students were able to speak were kind enough to say thanks. A great experience to be able to see what it took to make my 10-day move smoothly and be able to squeeze in some meditation time (about 4 hours a day).

Service is Better with Gratitude

My partner and I where talking about our beginnings. What made, what happen and when. It didn't really matter, because it changes nothing, nor makes anything clear that we don't already know in our heart. We both met with good intention and rested in it, when times were tough. So, I am doing service at a 4 day Vipassana with good intentions to give back to something that clearly helped with gratitude. I am excited, because even the confirmation call was done by a nice, happy, grateful person. It signals that this will good experience.